INSANITY

The past 2 days have been pretty much insanity.  I have OCD more than ever and in my head I think know that things can't be prefect all of the time but my eyes see things not in order and it sends my body into a fit of rage.  Is this forever for me?  I cannot stand being this way.  I shoot from being angry to crying to being angry because I cried.  I know there is HOPE.  If I don't take things literally one minute at a time I will fall apart.  All I can do is cry out to my Redeemer and say...you are all I need.  Lord what thing are you asking me to do next that I can't see clearly yet?  Lead me in the next step with grace and COURAGE!  I have to be ok with not "feeling" the peace yet.  It will come.  HE promises me that.  I will continue this coarse because I want him to be my everything....my person....my love....my life.  If I have to go through this for a time, help me to do it with such grace.  Be real to me Father...